I suddenly wish dad were around to deal with PCOS with me. I believe he would’ve actually understood this process better than mom. With dad, I think I would’ve had someone to make sure I kept up with the change process. This is not going to be a quick and easy transition (as much as I hope it would).
Dad’s life after his angioplasty was all about keeping fit, helping his heart beat normally. He didn’t stop, ever. He paused, sure. But not for more than a day or two. I have no idea how he did it; and today, as I’m going to be stepping into a new journey of self-care, I would’ve loved to have him around; giving me that traditional tough love, only to lighten the mood with a weird dance…
Dr. Mamatha said, “They’re not going to be happy if you’re not.” All this time, their voices in my head were hostile, for I let them go. But just hearing words felt like a glitch in the very real world of self-doubt.
I’ve been stuck for long, and I’ve known about it for long. Now, it seems like there’s an opportunity to, as Moira Rose puts it, “Snap out of the quicksand (of the) past.”
Life looks like it’s reaching out; I’m finally starting to catch up with it.
